The funeral reception

In simple terms, your choice of venue for a funeral reception is between holding it at home (the deceased’s home or that of a close relative) or in an external venue (a hired hall or hotel,

restaurant, club or pub). Sometimes it is not an easy choice but often the choice has already been decided, through the deceased’s requests or ‘because that is what he/she would have wanted’. This can help relieve a great deal of decision-making. But for those that still have to make the choice or would just like to know what each option holds, below I have detailed the issues to consider with each.

House versus Venue

House:

• Transport to and from the house: Where is the house located? Is it on a quiet street without much parking or with ‘pay and display’ parking? Is it down a very tight country lane where accidents are common? Does it have a large driveway that will accommodate some cars? How far from the church or funeral service is it? Is it easy to find? Perhaps a few designated directors

can guide people to the house from the service;

• Need to put certain areas ‘off limit’: This is someone’s home, maybe the deceased’s, or their family home. Either way, you need people to be respectful and to facilitate that you need to set some boundaries. If possible, lock bedroom doors or any ‘off limit’ areas. Put any and all valuables or precious items into these locked rooms;

• Provide maps: Even with all the technology around today, it never hurts to supply people with a physical and easy-to-read map with directions to the house, to make sure you don’t lose anyone en route;

• Immediate family only or all invited: This is a personal decision to make but also one to think about

logisitically. How popular was the deceased? Will everyone who was at the service attend the reception? Will people who could not make the service come to the reception? How many can the house and the food / drink cater for? Would a more quiet, ‘family only’ affair be more respectful and more tasteful?

• No peace and quiet: A common issue with having a reception in your own home is that there is no escape. You cannot retire to bed or relax on your couch and collect your thoughts, cry, laugh, reminisce or scream if you have invited people into your home. Everywhere you go in the house, you will find people who will want to sympathize with you;

• Marquee option: Having a reception in your home is a lovely idea but, if you expect numbers to exceed space you have available to cater for them, consider the option of hiring a marquee and placing it in the back or front garden. It will still have that homely feel but will ease the impact on your home;

Catering: 
Another critical aspect of having a reception in a home is catering for everyone. Typically, people are hungry after a funeral service – thirsty, too. Can you afford / do you have the space to cater for them all? Do you have the kitchen facilities to do it? Will it be finger food, buffet or a three-course meal? Can friends, family and neighbors bring a dish or some sandwiches and help out? It will certainly ease stress if a caterer can come and have all the food and drink (including cups of tea and coffee – a favorite at events such as funerals) prepared for you when you arrive home from the service and will clear up when you are finished. They also can supply the extra cutlery and glassware that would otherwise have to be rented or borrowed.

Venue:

• Transport to and from: Often a central venue in the local town or city center can be the best choice when it comes to transport. Typically, there is ample parking, directions to the venue are known, and roads and paths are well-lit and secure.

• Local or long distance: Did the deceased drink in a particular bar or visit a particular hotel or restaurant regularly? This could be ideal for the reception. Another option is to think of a venue where perhaps the deceased always wanted to visit. Choosing venues can be dependent on whether you wish to ask people to travel long distances. Elderly people may not be able to commit to the travel;

• Book accommodation: Depending on how far people must travel for the funeral service, you may have to provide them with accommodation information such as local bed and breakfasts or hotels. If you are holding the reception in a hotel, you might be able to negotiate a discount on rooms booked;

• House-sitters: If you choose to have the reception in a local hotel, it is sad, but often burglars are aware of this fact. The deceased’s details have been printed in the newspaper and this house is now empty, with potentially dozens of others on the same road or in the same estate as the deceased. All of these home-owners will be at the hotel at the reception. Safeguard yourself and your home against these opportunists and have a house-sitter mind your home, leave a radio or a TV on, make sure an alarm has been fitted to your home and leave some lights on. Give the impression someone is

home;

• Opportunity to get away if needed: A bonus to having a reception in a hotel, club, bar or local restaurant is that it is easy to slip away for some peace and quiet if you need to. Funerals can be very tiring and emotional experiences and while some people will wish to celebrate the deceased life long into the night, others will feel tired very fast and require some sleep or just a few moments alone;

• Music and entertainment: Having an external venue look after the reception also means that you can hire professionals to provide entertainment for your guests – maybe the deceased’s favorite band or trad singer or pianist?

Catering: 
Again, choosing a venue takes care of the catering issue. Professionals will cater to everyone’s taste and price. You can choose to pay for everything, or allow everyone to order for themselves or you can order some smaller items and if people wish to have more they can pay for it.

Regardless of which option you choose, home or external venue, there are still more decisions to make. Food and drink options will be similar whether the reception is held in the home or in a public house:

• Will you have a special toast for the deceased?

• Is there a special menu you would like to supply in honour of the deceased?

• Will you supply a buffet, finger food or sit down menu? What time will it be served at?

• Will you supply a free bar/limited bar or have people pay for/bring their own?

Another option could be to have a family sit-down dinner immediately after the service and meet up with everyone else in a broader reception afterward. Always keep some food aside; this might seem like a waste but it will not be. This food is for the immediate family who may or may not eat during the reception as they will be chatting with everyone and accepting sympathies. This food will be greatly appreciated after the reception when everyone has gone home.

Funeral Times Expo 2017

First-time exhibitor!

Had a great time meeting colleagues of the Irish Funeral Industry over the last 2 days at the Funeral Times Exhibition in Citywest Dublin.

Our Irish Human Memorial Jewellery went down very well, we were out of leaflets after the first day!

Interestingly alot of funeral directors said that cremation is increasing every year and people are often asking for cremation jewellery. Another interesting note for us was the interest in our Pet Memorial Jewellery! We even took some orders for some pet lover Funeral Directors who had lost their beloved pet in the last year.
There was also a VERY interesting method by one company to market their coffins.....I shall let you decided Yay or Nay......

Snapchat at funerals is now a thing!

The idea of using your phone to take ‘selfies’ with an app that has features like dog-faced filters and an obsession with watermelons and cat ears seems to go against the etiquette of a typical funeral in Ireland. But these times they are changing and funeral etiquette is evolving and revolving around social media as is the case with all celebrated life events. 

While customisable Snapchat Geo Filters have yet to come to Ireland, they are huge in the US where birthday, wedding and other life events are celebrated. “Happy 21^st Birthday Mia xx” or “Congrats Steve and Jane” are the norm but a new trend that is closely following, and indeed enhancing, the ‘selfies at funerals’ craze is the Snapchat Geo Filter at funerals – “RIP Trae” or “See you in Heaven Tyrese” along with a cartoon depiction of Trae or Tyrese are finding their place on peoples’ Snapchat stories.

One family embraced the idea when their 37-year-old brother (to Stephenie) and son died.  The Buchanons celebrated their son's life and asked friends and family to ‘snap a photo’ and swipe until they saw the words "T's World" and "We love you, Tarrence, rest in Heaven", superimposed over the taken ‘selfie’. Rather than be offended, funeral goers began taking selfies and embraced the experience.  

A US company that specialises in custom Geo Filters, Buy Custom Geofilters, gets about 300 requests a month for Geo Filters and the majority of them are for birthdays and weddings. Andrew Lee, the company's founder said that over the last three months requests for Funeral Geo Filters have been on the rise. When he received his first funeral request in August 2016, he never expected that his Geo Filters would be used as tributes to the dead. "The whole, 'sad funeral' and 'everybody wearing black' isn't as common these days," he said. "People are using the funeral to celebrate the lives. Geofilters are just another step to doing that."

The millennials are a generation that grew up on social media, with a camera always in hand, it’s how they communicate and celebrate life’s milestones. Stephenie had even nicknamed her brother "the Snapchat King," before his death which is something his friends now remember fondly and the Funeral Geo Filter seemed appropriate to celebrate Tarrence’s life.

A mothers eulogy as it should be

Graham Chapman and John Cleese

Graham Chapman's Memorial Service
John Cleese doing a hilarious and apt eulogy

Paddy died......An Irish Joke

Paddy died. His will provided £40,000 for an elaborate funeral.  

As the last guests departed the affair, his wife Colleen turned to her oldest and dearest friend.
"Ah well, Paddy would be pleased," she  said.

"You're right," replied Mary, who lowered her voice and leaned in  close.

"So go on, how much did this really cost?'"
"All of it," said Colleen.  "Forty thousand."


"Aw No!" Mary exclaimed, "I mean, it was very grand, but £40,000?!!!"
Colleen answered, "The funeral was £6,500. I donated £500 to church.  The whisky, wine and snacks were another £500.
The rest went for the Memorial Stone."

Mary  computed  quickly.

"For the love of Mike Colleen, £32,500 for a Memorial Stone?
How big is it?"

Emily Dickinson Because I could not stop

Because I could not stop for Death He kindly stopped for me The Carriage held but just Ourselves And Immortality. Emily Dickinson

100th POST!

How exciting to know that we have reached out 100th post here. That's not where the excitement ends because Farewell is changing and with it comes lots of new and exciting stories to tell so stay tuned into us, be safe, be happy and as one of my favourite Disney Characters says

"Always let your conscience be your guide..."

"Give a little whistle..."

WH Auden Quote

"It may be that your whole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
 We are here on Earth to do good to others. What the others are here for, I don't know."

 WH Auden

George Carlin Quote

"The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death! What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating...and you finish off as an orgasm."

George Carlin

Irish Jokes part 2

His wife had been killed in an accident and the police were questioning Finnegan.
"Did she say anything before she died?" asked the sergeant.
"She spoke without interruption for about forty years," said the Irishman.

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Paddy was rather sad after viewing the body of a dead atheist.
"There he was. All dressed up and no place to go."


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Brenda O'Malley is home as usual, making dinner, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door. "Brenda, may I come in?" he asks.
"I've somethin' to tell ya."
"Of course you can come in, you're always welcome, Tim. But where's my husband?"
"That's what I'm here to be tellin' ya, Brenda. There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery..."
"Oh, God no!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me..."
"I must, Brenda. Your husband Seamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry."
Brenda reached a hand out to her side, found the arm of the rocking chair by the fireplace, pulled the chair to her and collapsed into it. She wept for many minutes. Finally she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?"
"It was terrible, Brenda. Seamus fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned."
"Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me true, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?"
"Well, Brenda... no."
"No?"
"Fact is, he got out three times to pee."


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Irish Joke about Wakes

Why does an irishman's wake last for three days?
To make sure he's really dead and not just drunk.





(and this is a true story!!! No joke!)

To Arthur!!!

Brenda O'Malley is home as usual, making dinner, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door.
"Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I've somethin' to tell ya."
"Of course you can come in, you're always welcome, Tim. But where's my husband?"
"That's what I'm here to be tellin' ya, Brenda. There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery..."
"Oh, God no!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me..."
"I must, Brenda. Your husband Seamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry."
Brenda reached a hand out to her side, found the arm of the rocking chair by the fireplace, pulled the chair to her and collapsed into it. She wept for many minutes. Finally she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?"
"It was terrible, Brenda. Seamus fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned."
"Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me true, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?"
"Well, Brenda... no."
"No?"
"Fact is, he got out three times to pee."

Irish Jokes

" I hear Murphy died, " said Pat. "Was he ill long?"
"No," said Mick. "He died in the best of health."

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Paddy was walking through a graveyard when he came across a headstone with the inscription "Here lies a politician and an honest man."
"Faith now," exclaimed Paddy, "I wonder how they got the two of them in one grave."

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Mrs. Pete Monaghan came into the newsroom to pay for her husband's obituary. She was told by the kindly newsman that it was a dollar a word and he remembered Pete and wasn't it too bad about him passing away. She thanked him for his kind words and bemoaned the fact that she only had two dollars. But she wrote out the obituary,
"Pete died."
The newsman said he thought old Pete deserved more and he'd give her three more words at no charge. Mrs. Pete Monaghan thanked him and rewrote the obituary:
"Pete died. Boat for sale"

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"Mike," he says, "I know I'm a goner."
"Oh, Paddy, have faith, ye still have years ahead uv yuh."
"No, Mick, I'm finished an' you've been such a great friend, there's one thing I'd like yuh to do when I'm gone."
"Ahh, Paddy, I'll do anything you ask, I swear it to the Saints and the Holy Mother."
"Well, dear friend, I have been saving a jug of fine whiskey that my brother sent me from Cashel some eight years ago, and I would like you to pour it on me grave when I'm buried."
Mike sits silently for a long time and Pat asks again,
"will you o that for yer oldest friend, Mike?"
Mike draws a big breath and says, "Ye know I will Pat, but would ye mind if I filter it through me kidneys first?'

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Small Irish Joke for the Weekend

What's the difference between an Irish funeral and an Irish wedding?

One less drunk!






You have probably heard it a million times but I love it!

Big plans for life

Source: google.ie via Jennifer on Pinterest