How We Use the Senses to Create Unforgettable Farewells

When planning a funeral or memorial, people tend to focus on the big-ticket items—like the venue, the flowers, the eulogy, and, of course, the music. But let’s be real, it’s often the little details that make a service truly memorable. At my company Muldowney Memorials, we’re all about creating an experience that hits all the senses, leaving a lasting and meaningful impression. Here’s a little peek into how we do it.

Visual Sensations: Creating a Scene That Speaks

We all know how much visual stimuli affect our moods and emotions. That’s why we’re super careful to observe the setting for each service, paying attention to the colours, shapes, and textures that will surround everyone.

Whether we’re indoors or out, the visual element is like the canvas we paint on to set the vibe. Think about the way flowers are arranged, the flicker of candles, or even how the light hits the room—every detail is a reflection of the person we’re honouring.

Auditory Sensations: A Soundtrack for the Soul

Sound is one of the most underrated yet powerful tools when it comes to emotions. Whether it’s the soft rustle of leaves in the wind, a favourite song, or just the quiet in between—silence can be golden, too—we want to create a symphony that feels just right.

We love helping families choose music that brings back cherished memories or just feels like the right tribute. It could be something as simple as wind chimes, a solo violin, or a carefully curated playlist that reflects the life of the person we’re remembering.

Tactile Sensations: Grounding in the Moment

Touch is one of those senses we sometimes forget about, but it’s so grounding, especially during emotional times. We often offer keepsakes like a smooth stone, a favourite fabric, or even a personal item of the person who has passed.

The texture, weight, and temperature of these items can really help people connect on a deeper level, offering comfort and grounding during grief.

Olfactory Sensations: The Power of a Scent

We all know how a certain scent can instantly transport us to a specific moment or memory. Whether it’s the fresh scent of flowers, the warmth of candles, or a personal fragrance, the sense of smell is key in making a service feel personal.

A calming scent like lavender or even the perfume or cologne of the departed can create a space where memories come flooding back—allowing people to reflect and feel closer to their loved ones.

Gustatory Sensations: Taste as Memory

Taste might seem a little outside the box for a funeral or memorial, but trust me, it’s a game-changer. Food is comfort, and sharing a favourite meal or snack of the departed can be a beautiful way to bring everyone together.

We encourage families to incorporate something meaningful—a special dish, a favourite drink—whatever helps spark that moment of connection. It’s not just about the food, it’s about the shared experience, the flavours, and the memories tied to them.

We get that a funeral isn’t just an event—it’s an experience. By engaging all five senses, we create those special moments of connection, reflection, and remembrance that stay with you long after the service is over.

K. Krombie - Uncovering New York's Dark History!

 In this episode of The Glam Reaper Podcast, host Jennifer Muldowney, aka The Glam Reaper, takes listeners on a journey through New York City’s darker history with the brilliant K. Krombie, a British author, freelance writer, journalist, and founder of Purefinder New York. All while sitting in Central Park!!

Krombie is renowned for her deeply researched walking tours that shine a light on the city's untold stories of death and cemeteries.

Jennifer and Krombie dive into the fascinating world of burials in the Big Apple, spanning over 400 years of history. Together, they discuss Krombie’s book, Death in New York: History and Culture of Burials, Undertakers and Executions, and explore the mismanagement of death in Manhattan, from overcrowded cemeteries to forgotten burial grounds. They also uncover how epidemics, riots, and even forgotten skeletons have shaped the city’s landscape and reflect on the ongoing challenges of honoring the dead in a space-challenged metropolis.

Whether you’re a history buff or simply curious about New York’s hidden past, this episode will transport you to a side of the city you’ve never seen before. Don’t miss this insightful conversation packed with forgotten tales, burial scandals, and thought-provoking discussions about life and death in the concrete jungle.

Tune in now to learn about the past that’s still buried beneath New York’s streets!

Awesome facts from the episode: 

Washington Square Park holds a secret: There are approximately 20,000 bodies buried beneath it, a result of yellow fever epidemics in the 1800s.

Grave robbing was a serious issue in New York: In 1788, a riot broke out when student doctors were caught stealing bodies from cemeteries for dissection, leading to legal reforms.

In the 1700s, drinking water in New York often flowed through graveyards, including a fountain at Trinity Church, contributing to cholera outbreaks.

Seneca Village, located in what is now Central Park, was a black settlement in the 1820s with churches and burial grounds, many of which remain under the park today.

The Bone Bill of 1854 allowed unclaimed bodies, particularly vagrants, to be dissected by medical students, a law that remained in place until it was finally amended in 2016.

Website - https://www.purefindernewyork.com/

Promotional code to get 15% discount: Glamreaper

Watch Episode here

Spotify:

Apple podcast:

Youtube:

Death Glitch: How Tech is Changing Mourning Forever

 

Ai is everywhere now. We cannot escape it, even in Death.

In this episode of The Glam Reaper, Jennifer Muldowney sits down with Tamara Kneese, Author, and Leader of the Data & Society Research Institute’s Algorithmic Impact Methods Lab (thats a mouthful!) They explore the intersection of death, and technology. 

Tamara, an academic and writer, shares her unique insights into how technology is rapidly changing the landscape of digital legacy and mourning. From her book "Death Glitch" to recent discussions on AI and grief, Tamara reflects on the evolving challenges and the necessity for continuous research in the field of Death and Tech.

The conversation delves into the history and evolution of digital cultures, highlighting the rise and fall of startups in the funeral space.

To hear more from Jennifer on the whole AI + Grief/Death Conversation check out the video 'Living Forever: how Ai is reshaping life after death'

A Guide to a Meaningful Funeral Program

A funeral program is one of those heartfelt keepsakes that lets friends and family cherish and remember a loved one. This simple piece of paper turns into a memento that provides comfort and connection long after the service is over.

A funeral program, often called an order of service or pamphlet, is more than just paper. It outlines the service, shares memorable quotes, poems, and photos, and helps guide attendees through the event. This cherished memento can be personalized to reflect the unique spirit of your loved one. It’s customary to hand out programs as attendees arrive or to leave one on each seat, but there's no pressure if it doesn’t fit your style of service.

Designing a funeral program starts with understanding its structure and content. Traditional services might include things like a music prelude, scripture readings, prayers, and eulogies. Non-traditional services could feature open mic tributes, informal gatherings, and moments of silence. The goal is to honor your loved one in a way that feels authentic and meaningful.

Step-by-Step Guide to Crafting a Funeral Program

Cover Page: The cover page is the first thing people see. It typically includes the person’s name, birth and death dates, and a meaningful photo or collage. You might also add a program title or theme and an inspirational quote or saying.

Inside Pages (if any): Open the program to the main section, which outlines the order of service. This part contains details like the eulogies, music details, readings, photos, and more. It’s helpful to list the names of those participating in the service to acknowledge their contributions.

Back Page: The back of the program can include additional details like acknowledgements, thank you messages, and information about post-service gatherings or receptions. It’s also a place to share any extra quotes or personal messages. Some families choose to share a donation request here.

Personalizing the program can make it a more fitting tribute. Consider these elements:

Color and Design: Pick colors and design themes that resonate with your loved one’s personality or your family’s traditions. Floral designs, nature motifs, or specific color schemes can add a meaningful touch.

Tone: The language and tone should reflect the mood of the service. If your loved one had a great sense of humor, an upbeat tone or a witty quote might be perfect. For a more solemn or traditional service, a formal tone can be used.

Type Styles: The fonts and styles of type can set the tone of the program. Elegant script fonts might be suitable for a formal service, while clean, modern fonts can create a contemporary feel.

Photos: Including photos is a powerful way to honor your loved one. A cover photo and additional images throughout the program can show different life stages, like childhood, family life, and professional achievements.

Printing - Make sure to discuss the timeline to have the programs ready in time for the service!!

Caleb Wilde - Confessions of a Funeral Director

The Glam Reaper, Jennifer sitting down with Caleb Wilde over a 3 part video - Caleb is a sixth-generation funeral director and the conversation delves into cultural sensitivity in America, funeral planning and he discusses his upbringing and familial influences that propelled him into this profession. 

PART 1

PART 2

FINALE

Tune in to hear first hand from the man himself some confessions of a funeral director!

The Rise of Virtual Funerals: Navigating Loss in the Digital Age

 

In this episode of The Glam Reaper Podcast, Jennifer sits down with Mandy Benoualid, co-founder of TalkDeath and Keeper. Mandy shares her journey of recognizing a need for educational content in the death care industry, which led to the creation of TalkDeath and their online memorial provider company Keeper. Jennifer and Mandy conversed about the impact of social media on death and grieving, normalizing conversations around death. They touch upon their social media presence across various platforms and their strategies for engaging with their audience. They talk about the almost mandatory live streaming that is a growing trend in the funeral space. Tune in for a fascinating exploration of unconventional approaches to death and grieving, along with the impact of social media on the funeral industry! Key Topics: -Crafting Heartfelt Online Memorials -Saying Goodbye in the Digital Age -Streamlining Farewell Services Online -Different Perspectives on Death and Healing Quotes From The Episode: It's not just black and white ….. It's also talking about who actually has access to a good death. - Mandy Benoualid I think at the end of the day, what anybody in this space on social media is trying to do is have the community talk about it, like literally talk about death. - Jennifer Muldowney Connect with Mandy Benoualin: LinkedIn - linkedin.com/in/mandy-benoualid Website - https://www.talkdeath.com/ Instagram -   / talkdeathdaily   Twitter -   / talkdeathdaily  

Breaking the Silence: Understanding Modern Loss

 

In this episode of The Glam Reaper Podcast, Jennifer sits down with Rebecca Soffer, Co-founder and CEO of Modern Loss. Rebecca opens up about her personal journey as a grief coach and author, sharing how Modern Loss has become a beacon of solace for countless individuals navigating the tumultuous seas of bereavement. Rebecca also emphasizes the significance of creating safe spaces for individuals to share their experiences and feel understood and Jennifer states the value of providing solace to those grappling with loss, underscoring the universal nature of grief and the need for greater societal understanding and support. Tune in now as we navigate the depths of grief and loss with Rebecca Soffer! Key Topics: -Starting the profound journey through sorrow and grief. -Creating strong connections amid modern experiences of sadness and loss. -Obliterating Stigma Around Grief -Creating Safe Spaces for Sharing -Importance of Being Heard in Grief Quotes From The Episode: There is no fix for grief, there is no fix for loss. - Rebecca Soffer We don't necessarily need somebody to solve all our problems, we just need to be seen, and heard, And that's it. - Jennifer Muldowney Connect with Rebecca Soffer Instagram -   / rebeccasoffer   LinkedIn -   / rebeccasoffer   Twitter - https://twitter.com/rebeccasoffer?lan... Website - https://modernloss.com/the-modern-los...